WELCOME to HAPPY TO BE...This is a blog about my love of Antiques, My family, humor, as humor keeps us laughing and my every Day life...I hope you enjoy your visit...Please leave me a comment to let me know you Came by so I can visit with you Thank You !!...Hugs and Smiles, Gl♥ria
MEDICAL EXAMS 1. A man comes into the ER and yells . .
My wife ' s
going to have her baby in the cab. ' I grabbed my stuff, rushed
out to the cab, lifted the lady ' s dress and began to take off her
underwear. Suddenly I noticed that
there were several cabs - - - and I was in the wrong one. Submitted by
Dr. Mark MacDonald , San Francisco
2... At the
beginning of my shiftI placed a stethoscope on an
elderlyand slightly deaf female patient ' s
anterior chest wall. ' Big
breaths, ' . . . I instructed. ' Yes, they used to be, ' . . . replied the
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes , Seattle ,
3. One day I had to
be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a
massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five
minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had
died of a ' massive internal fart.'
Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg
4. During a
patient ' s two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed
me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with One of his
medications. 'Which one? ' . .. . I
asked. ' The patch... The Nurse told me to put on
a new one every six hours and now I ' m running out of places to put it!
' I had him quickly undress
and discovered what I hoped I wouldn ' t see. Yes, the man had over fifty
patches on his body! Now, the
instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.
Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair , Norfolk ,
acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, ' How long have you
been bedridden? ' After a look of complete
confusion she answered . . . ' Why, not for about twenty
years - when my husband was alive. '
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson- Corvallis ,
6. I was
performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man I
asked . . . ' So how ' s your breakfast this morning? ' 'It's very good except
for the Kentucky Jelly. I can ' t seem to get used to the taste.' . Bob
replied. I then asked to see the
jelly and Bob produced A foil packet labeled ' KY Jelly. '
Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf , Detroit
7. A nurse was on
duty in the Emergency Room when a young woman with purple hair styled
into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing
strange clothing, entered . . . It was quickly determined that the
patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery..
When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed
that her pubic hair had been dyed green and above it there was a tattoo
that read . . . ' Keep off the grass. ' Once the surgery
was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient ' s dressing,
which said ' Sorry . . . had to mow the lawn. '
Submitted by RN no name, AND FINALLY!! ! . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . .
8. As a
new, young MD doing his residency in OB. I was quite embarrassed
when performing female pelvic exams... To cover my embarrassment I had
unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. The
middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out
laughing and further embarrassing
me. I looked up from my work
and sheepishly said. . . ' I ' m sorry. Was I tickling you? ' She
replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard . .
. ' No doctor
but the song you were whistling was . . . ' I wish I was an Oscar Meyer
Wiener . ' Dr. wouldn ' t submit his name....
Baby ' s First Doctor Visit
made me laugh out loud. I hope it will give you a smile!
and a baby were in the doctor ' s examining room, waiting for the doctor to come
in for the baby ' s first exam.
The doctor arrived, and examined the
baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was
breast-fed or bottle-fed.
'Breast-fed, ' she replied..
Well, strip down to your waist, ' the doctor ordered.
She did. He
pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a
very professional and detailed examination.
Motioning to her to get
dressed, the doctor said, ' No wonder this baby is underweight. You don ' t
have any milk. '
My God My Family My Country My Life My Mama-to the moon and back My Mountain top home Seeing my daughters all grown into wonderful women My 7 Grand Children My 10 Great Grand Children Tree's/ Flowers Nature's animals Birds Singing Quiet Evenings with Len Swap meets Antique Shopping History Books/Danielle Steel Decorating magazines Victorian furniture Decorating Dishes/Silver Warm bed in the Winter Fireplaces in winter My old Red Robe/Furry Slippers Antique Dolls/Doll houses Old Photo Albums My Juke box Christmas Doing Lunch Coffee in the morning Dateline TV Chick Flicks You Got Mail, Steel Magnoilas, Notebook Country Music Brook & Dunn, Rascal Flatts, Toby Keith, Alan Jackson (YUM) Crafts Making Victorian Lamp Shades Seeing My family with their arms wrapped around each other in L♥ve Blogging/ Meeting caring, sharing with lovely women
FOODS THAT I LOVE: Ham Hocks and Beans Corn bread with honey butter Homemade Noodles with Chicken Fried Green Tomatoes with ranch dressing YUM!
THINGS I DON"T LIKE
Sefish People / meme people
Liar's/Thieves= one and the same to me
Sunday only Christians
Cell Phone Driver's
Scary Movies/ Horror Movies
Liver and onions YUK !!!
Helen Keller quote's
THE BEST AND MOST BEAUTIFUL THING'S IN LIFE...CANNOT BE SEEN OR TOUCHED...BUT FELTED IN THE HEART !!! HELEN KELLER CA. 1928
Dear Mama, God saw you getting tired and a cure was not to be.
So his put his arms around you and whispered "Come to me"
We grateful eyes I watched you pass away, Althought I loved you dearly I could not make you stay.
A Golden heart stopped beating hard working hands at rest.
God broke my heart to prove to me he only takes the best.
My Mama ~ 5/2/07. I miss your Lo♥e every day Mama!!